Violence Against Men in Kenya

by Susan Kihara | Wednesday, May 27th Tags:

Men and violence

After the dust had settled on the declaration by Maendeleo ya Wanaume that Men in Kenya are increasingly being battered by their wives, a myriad of thoughts crossed my mind; "what are the reasons, how true is this, what is causing this, how can this be stopped, what is the true agenda of the report, where can I get a copy, how will this affect me as a young woman in Kenya originating rom Central Province etc".

This is a collection of some of my thoughts on the issue of men and violence. They are based on observations, interactions and engagements with young and old people in the course of my young life. I do not have all the answers, but I have a few questions that I would love to engage with other people who may offer insights.

The media in Kenya in its usual true form has sensationally milked the story to the last ounce of attention grabbing nature possible. It has brought to the fore a topic hitherto ignored or meontioned only in ridicule - the emansculation and emancipation of men. Are men stuck in ancient defined gender roles of protector and provider? What informs being a man in the modern society? What are the gender norms and roles assigned to him that defines his masculinity? What spaces are availed to enable him to exercise his roles and responsibilities without loosing his identity? Did the report also include other forms of violence and not just physical violence as perpetuated by other men on their fellow men?

These questions continue to hold my brain captive and I can only hope to get some responses.

Susan Kihara's blog

Ajer ner blogi yajez 547 handi

Submitted by Gespalestine (not verified) on Tue, 12/20/2011 - 20:25.

Ajer ner blogi yajez 547 handi :)
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Ajer ner blogi yajez 547 handi

Submitted by Gespalestine (not verified) on Tue, 12/20/2011 - 13:15.

Ajer ner blogi yajez 547 handi :)
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Masculinity in crisis

Submitted by Violet on Wed, 12/02/2009 - 03:34.

Great discussion ladies!

i love not just like this debate. It ties in perfect with a module am taking on my course this semester on the Social construction of masculinities. It makes perfect sense what Saida and indeed all of you have said about the case of hegemonic masculinity in crisis.

One of the most interesting texts on this subject is by Michael Kimmel(1994)'Masculinity as homophobia' if u can get access to this essay( probably frm google )it's perfect cos it's told from a man's point of view and i think he did quite a good job in interrogating masculinity; it's failures, insecurities and pressures.

Here in the UK for instance due to the economic downturn, most men have lost jobs and it's mainly women who are now running households ( economically at least) because the so called feminine jobs like nursing, teaching, social work and care are not as affected by the recess as big company and business-centred jobs where majority of men are to be found.

This means that the sex/gender role within the domestic space has absolutely changed! you now find men working fulltime in the kitchen and minding the kid(s) as women stay up in the public sphere to earn money for the bills! The trend is becoming widely accepted. But in Kenya, and much of our beloved Africa, this would be a case of GBV in the in-tray of Njoka..ha ha ha

The problem we got in Kenya is that whereas women are moving from the private(domestic) sphere to the public as a result of increased opportunities from academic, political n' social consciousness, men are still negotiating the exit-entry dichotomy into and out of the private-public space. It doesnt make sense for men to cling on to the traditional gender roles while reaping the fruits of modern academic and civilized assignments which inevitably must reverse or at least interfere with the traditions. They readily accept the idea of sharing costs with women within unions, but consider sharing domestic responsibilities as amounting to GBV!? This is outrageous! Double-standard!

There's dire need, at least according to me, for a deconstruction of what's been the hegemonic masculinity. If we view today's successful man as ' one who is ready to help with the kitchen, do homework with the kids, change diapers and get food supplies from the tesco, media should run with this and soon, all men will want to be identified with this discription!!

Thanks ladies for this space..i will be more regular here!!!

Reversed roles

Submitted by Loys26 on Mon, 06/15/2009 - 09:45.

I watched Carole Mandi's show yesterday on the topic and what I got from the Chairman of Maendeleo ya Wanaume is that men being asked to take part in the responsibilities in the home amounts to abuse...I do not dispute that there are men that are being abused but I think that the statistics that he released are suspect. My understanding of relationships is that they are a partnership and men who are still stuck in the old ways of thinking that rearing children, cooking and making a cup of tea for guests are roles that are strictly left for women need to rethink their stand and consider what type of wife they really want to marry!!

Re: It is masculinities in crisis!!

Submitted by Saida on Wed, 06/17/2009 - 11:29.

Like I said before, it is definitely a case of masculinities in crisis!

Submitted by sophie (not verified) on Tue, 06/02/2009 - 17:27.

Responses

Submitted by Susan Kihara on Tue, 06/02/2009 - 16:16.

Thanks for all your comments to my random thoughts on the whole issue of violence against men in Kenya.

Saida, I unfortunately was not able to tune in to watch, but I am glad that you represented a constituency that is bearing the brunt of Gender Based Violence and highlighted our concerns as young women. Flawed masculinities need to be examined, questioned and interogated for any meaningful engagements and enhancement on the promotion of women's rights in Kenya.

Sophie, unfortunately, the picture that was highlighted from his press conference is that men are being asked to shoulder responsibilities that are not in their forte. Nurturing of children was clearly defined as being the role of women and that any action contrary to that was tatamount to violence.

Kathambi, those statistics are quite shocking and if true really paint a gloomy scenario. Lets hope that the organization would be willing to share the report with other interested parties. But I am glad that this has given more visibility to the issues of men and the boy child in Kenya and created public spaces for people to exchange views.

Thanks for giving us a space to express our thoughts in a protected and bias free environment.

Re: masculinities in crisis

Submitted by Saida on Fri, 06/05/2009 - 00:16.

@Susan. Even during the show, Njoka still insisted that men being asked to share responsibilities related to household chores and "taking care of children" violates the rights of African men, and that our culture is in problems if women are thinking otherwise. I was very happy that a man called in and told him "wakati umebadilika, nenda na wakati"... This is what I always call msculinities in crisis.

@Kathambi. Just decalring publicly that I am not a batterer, ...I am seriously questioning what his hypotheses were. I do not think he wants to share the report. I have his number and will follow up for a copy of the report.

Doubting its accuracy

Submitted by Kathambi K on Tue, 06/02/2009 - 13:59.

Great post, Susan.

I doubt the accuracy of the report. In one media story, I can't remember which, it says MYW claims that 60 per cent of women admit to battering men. 60 per cent! Really? That means that out of the three women who have commented on this blog post, two of us are batterers. Does either of you want to own up, because I know it's not me!

Also, like Sophie says, violations, according to the report, include being asked to do household chores and look after babies.

I'd be interested in reading the report before commenting further, but it seems to me like a lot of hogwash.

Watch me on Citizen TV talk about this issue

Submitted by Saida on Sat, 05/30/2009 - 19:23.

@Susan. I wil be taking part in an interview tomorrow (Sunday 31/05/09), on Citizen TV, 10 am. It is a Swahili programme. Unfortunately this was not planned, so I was not able to notify all those interested in good time. My co-panelist is Mr. Njoka, the Maendeleo ya Wanaume chairperson. It is likely to be a call-in programme so if you watch it you will be able to ask Njoka for clarfications on some of the issues emerging from the report. Whichever way, rest assurred that I will raise or address some of these concerns from young women. The main ones being those related to construction of masculinities, Othering and labelling. I will also request that he shares the report and clarify what research methodology was applied. I do not wish to dismiss that we have some abused men worldwide let alone Kenya but the statistics don't seem right. There are more issues on hegemonic masculinities that are of great concern especially in regards to the advancement of women's rights.

Where is the truth

Submitted by sophie (not verified) on Wed, 05/27/2009 - 16:29.

Susan I hear you. More than anything else, I am pertubed at the definition of GBV that the group gave to include house chores. For me it was more of flawed masculnity at play where house work while done by a woman is duty while by man is violence. however it is posible and is true there are men being violated but the way this was presented leaves more Qs than answers, being more of ridicule than seriousness. The defined roles of protectr and privder are not going down well in the current society where both women and men are providing, leading to hurt egos and low esteem. The man in the modern society is therefore caught in between having to cater for his tranditional roles and get the benefits from this but also benefit from the modern world where the women is to be heard and seen. The truth is that women's empowerment are not to blame for the 'violence' as the report insuniated. As for you Susan and me..... the fact that central women have been declared as husband batterers.........well, it is for the gents to shape up, since we need to co-exist

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