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Heart break- What do you do?
| by Anonymous | Wednesday, June 17th |
I was having some meeting with a young lady that I mentor when she asked me" what do you do when someone breaks your heart?" The answer to that is not easy and I am not sure anyone can claim to have the answers. It caught me off guard and in between empathising and careful not to say the wrong thing.....I founf this tough! Apart from listening what else do I do? It got me thinking, are there any rules? Many if not all of us have had a heart break at one time or the other and we can remember those people and especially girl friends that were not helpful, and those that were so helpful. Others with an aim to help made matters worse by telling us how that person was not worth our efforts and good riddance.....ignoring the fact that the heart felt otherwise. Others gave us a shoulder to cry on for a whole night even if deep inside they were wondering....why should you cry over..... . I tend to believe that the heart never grows old but we become wise with time. A younger lady once commented that older sisters dont seem to understand.....you know those times that you are asking other sisters, you are just 20 yrs.....
So I ask, How do you handle heart break? How do you handle a pal going through a heart break? What are our best and worst experiences if we dare? I look forward to hear from you!!!!
A broken Heart
Sophie...This I can assure you talks to many of us..mine especially. I find myself so often saying I will never let any one break my heart or see me cry. Over and over I do this but over and over I am crying ober something. I would say for me I sometimes live in denial. I pretend that nothing has happen and that I am ok...though inside I know that I am hurting..clearly this does'nt solve anything.
Sometimes I talk to my girlfriends and plot for the perfect revenge..hoping that this will take awa the pain and the emarassment I have been subjected to but wapi! In some instances I have ended up looking like a fool.
Rule, rules, rules....what are the rules! I have been watching some moveis to syk me up on how to deal with the "enemy" one of my favourites was "Two can play this game" starring Viivica Fox. I watched both 1 and 2. Is it really practical to go out of your way and take your time revenging or plotting against someone who hurt you?
The other day my gilrfriend and I were trying to plan the perfect way to leave a cheating partner since she was having issues with her men. These are the options she came up with.
a) Leave him and live in isolation for a year. Hopefully by that time you will be over them
b)Leave your partner and jus loose it. Do what you want and wallow in your misery, drink,binge eat, sleep alot over work etc...at some point you will forget them
c)Stay with your partner even if he is cheating and pray that hopefully he will change...NOT!
d) Stay and do as he does.......
After a while I realized that all these things are based on this cheating spouse...their lives will go on as I wallow in my misery and all in all I will be the bitter looser.
As at now I think that whatever we do to heal a broken heart, it should not be pegged on the person who broke your heart in the first place. It should be about you as an individual. I also believe that the bravest thing that a young woman can do is embrace her heart break...face the pain....cry if you like ....take it headstrong and face each day as it comes.
Best!
A broken heart
"Broken Hearts, Torn Up Letters And The Story Of A Lonely Girl"
Broken hearts and torn up letters
Girl you just can't dance forever
If you want to make it better...
Her hands are in her pockets
And she's scared to look
The picture's frozen
And she's closed the book
Jealousy has only got one friend
And Joey's heart was never meant to mend
Walking faster now she holds him close
The timing matters just to take the dose
Empty pockets tell the stories..
And there's no destiny when everyone's your enemy
Take your jealous heart and cast it into stone
You'll regret it all
Living behind your wall
And you'll never fall in love
If you don't fall at all
Broken hearts and torn up letters
Girl you just can't dance forever
If you want to make it better...
The nights are getting darker
And the wind is cold
The summer sun
Has now become so old
Her closest friends
Were never meant to fade
With all these dreams
That didn't make the grade
Close the doors but never look inside
Time will tell if all your love has died
Empty pockets tell the stories...
And there's no destiny when everyone's your enemy
Take your jealous heart and cast it into stone
You'll regret it all
Living behind your wall
And you'll never fall in love
If you don't risk it all
Broken hearts and torn up letters
Girl you just can't dance forever
If you want to make it better
Broken hearts and torn up letters
Girl you just can't dance forever
If you want to make it better
Times like these won't last forever...
Close the doors but never look inside
Time will tell if all your love has died
Empty pockets tell the stories...
And there's no destiny when everyone's your enemy
Take your jealous heart and cast it into stone
You'll regret it all
Living behind your wall
And you'll never fall in love
If you don't fall at all
You'll regret it all
(Broken hearts and torn up letters)
Living behind your wall
(Girl you just can't dance forever)
And you'll never fall in love if you don't risk it all
(If you want to make it better...)
Broken hearts and torn up letters
Girl you just can't dance forever
If you want to make it better
Times like these won't last forever.